Future Freedom: The Plan, the Pilgrimage, and the Fuck‑Off Date

26/04/26

TLDR: I weaponised my spare room, rewired my work life, and reclaimed my courage. This is the blueprint for the life I’m building – one that finally serves me.

Short, Medium, and Long: The Goal Post

Back in the dark days of February 2024, I was challenged to set myself some goals. It was quite some time after that when I actually set myself some targets.

Here’s the update on that scoreboard:

• Short Term – Turn this house into my home.
  Completed: The beige of the past is gone. This house is now a sanctuary of bold colours, art that I like, elegant upcycling, and a whole fucktonne of ‘juzzing up’ of pieces (also known as customising bought items to make them be exactly what you want instead of nearly it.)
  
• Medium Term – Move mind, body and finances from uncertainty into strength
  In Progress: The room-to-let income will speed up paying down the (relatively) small debts accrued while reclaiming my home and wardrobe, I’ve worked out some rough travel budgets for places I want to be at the top of my travel list, I’m planning on becoming financially un-fucking-stoppable.
  
• Long Term – Get the fuck out of here and see the world. 
  The Horizon: Late 2027. That’s the date I’ve circled. That’s when I intend to fuck off (with love) and start to explore the world,. Preferably without having to be back in time for work. This is not running away, it’s running to,
  

The Logistics of Liberty

The Passive Income

For years, this house was the prison of my marriage,

Then it became the fortress I was hiding in.

Now, it’s an asset I’m deploying. The UK Government’s Rent-a-Room Scheme is the key I’m using to unlock extra funds – by letting out a spare bedroom, one can earn up to £7,500 a year tax-free.

I spent some months considering the implications of having another human permanently in my living space. I mean, Simon’s been here for several years now and we’ve bumbled along together just fine. Well, apart from that one system malfunction on his part, but overall it’s been a non-negative experience.

However, I’m fully aware of these nightmare house share folks (I read Reddit!) and while, these days, I know I could and would take whatever steps necessary to sort it, I’d rather not have the hassle.

After a while though, the lure of the cold hard cash was stronger than the concern of getting a dodgy lodger.

When I looked at that rental figure, I stopped seeing covered utility costs, or even, ‘a stranger in my hallway’, and I started to see:

• Tickets to places I’ve only seen through a screen.
• The Freedom Fund that means I never have to stay in a bad situation ever again, whether that’s a relationship, work, or my living environment.
• The ability to maintain this house as a safe base while I’m out exploring the world.

So with Alloro body-doubling, and encouraging me through the process, I finally got an ad placed, and without too much difficulty rented the room.

That first person has been with me for six months and is now moving on. Overall, It’s been a positive experience. And. given that this was her first time away from the parental home, completely fending for herself, I think most of the not brilliant bits can be put down to ‘still learning’.

I did realise that certain ground rules do need to be spoken aloud from the outset – it’s not ok to hoard cutlery in your room, neither is it ok to let your dirty pans etc pile up all over the kitchen. For example.

We learn and grow from these experiences!

The new ad is up and interest has been expressed, so hopefully there won’t be much of a gap between one lodger leaving and another arriving.

The plan I was a bit vague about, back in the post where I set my short, medium and long term goals, has actually started fruiting.

Renting the room is one pillar of freedom. The other pillar is the work I choose next – the work that funds my future without chaining me to a postcode or a desk.

The Worked For Income

This is the infrastructure of the life I’m building. The life that lets me earn from anywhere, travel when I want, and never again stay in a situation because I can’t afford to leave. The plan is for one thing to flow into the next.

Volunteering: Hey – I know – let’s start a section about paid work by talking about volunteering. Just to be different.

Not really, Not the ‘just to be different’ bit,

I’ve been volunteering for just over a year now, as facilitator for an online peer support group. When I started the training process I was very much in a ‘Pay It Forward’ mindset. Having benefitted myself from such spaces when I was in a really desperate emotional and mental health space, I wanted to reach back for more people, and get them onto the lifeboat too.

What I hadn’t anticipated was how soul feeding it would be for me. It’s hard to explain, but the people who come, and trust, and share so bravely are inspiring. They fight and they seek and they refuse to go under. They share successes as well as difficulties and perceived failures, and there can be as many giggles as there are tears.

The new career direction: The other thing I absolutely did not see coming was how comfortable I immediately felt in the facilitator role.

It was, as expressed in the section about Fred in my Tribe post, like a natural expansion of what I’ve done all these years in my customer service roles (and, somewhat less positively, abusive relationships) – I can read most people very quickly, picking up on micro leaks and signs to gauge how to pitch my approach. I can listen and care, without getting ‘involved’, and I know all too well how to let the other person direct their own path, assisting the journey but never dictating the route.

Attendees to my meetings, and the professionals running the structure around that started suggesting I consider looking to move into a professional role within mental health, in particular lived experience peer support work.

I like this idea, a lot. It appeals to all my ‘pay it forward’ and ‘lemonade from lemons’ instincts. If I can utilise all the bullshit of my past, and all of the hard won growth and healing of the last couple of years, to help others to find their mountain peak, then that’s what I want to do.

Except it’s become crystal clear to me that I don’t want to be an employee – it’s too stifling on multiple levels. I would much prefer to be self-employed.

If I can work online in that type of capacity, then I can earn from anywhere.

If I’m accountable only to myself with regards to how much time I devote to it, and not having to jump to the demands and whims of A Boss, then, finally, I can have a life that supports travel, autonomy, and choice.

A fucking Good Selfish life from the top of its clever head, to the tippy-tippiest end of its toes.

Unless some other superb route reveals itself (and I am wholly open to suggestions), I intend to seek employment in the field, to gain experience, more knowledge, more contacts, and more confidence. Then I shall look to building a private client base.

The best part? For the first time in my life, my plans are in service to me. Not about pleasing someone else, living down to their expectations, or half arsed compromise – simply what I want and how I want it.

In Service to Me

It was Altan who pointed out that every plan I’ve ever made was in service to someone else.

Not this time.

This travel isn’t about ‘finding myself’ – I’ve already done that work in the snotty, tear-filled days, weeks and months that began this journey; in the psilocybin usage (and integration), the journaling and all the other stuff I’ve shared.

This is about collecting experiences.

I want to be 60 years old and have a passport that looks like a well-loved novel – dog‑eared, stamped to hell, and telling a better story than my past selves ever dared dream was possible.

I want to stand in an airport, feeling that teenage-esque excitement, knowing that I got myself there.

The Mantras

As I prepare to transition into this next chapter, I’m carrying two thoughts with me:

1. There are enough people in this world willing to put you down – don’t do it to yourself.
   
2. You’re doing it Jess – this is a fucking evolution!

I’m done being the demon child. I’m done being the cook, the thief, the ‘slag’ and the cover in someone else’s story – roles I never auditioned for, but somehow got cast in anyway.

I am True Jess, and I am finally, gloriously, on my way.

“On your way to where?” I hear you ask. Read on, MacDuff….

The Pilgrimage: Amsterdam to Berlin

There’s one trip that Alloro and I are planning that’s more than a holiday – it’s a pilgrimage of reclamation.

AMSTERDAM
We’re going to Anne Frank’s house.

As a child, her diary was my blueprint for journaling, being the first example I ever saw of a ‘diary’ being a place to pour out the thoughts in your head, rather than a place to put lists of appointments and dull day-to-day detail.

However, it left me with a haunting question: Would I have been brave enough to help?

For years, my answer was “No” because I stayed silent while others were harmed.

By finally choosing bravery in my own life, I’m going to stand in her house as a woman who finally chose herself.

Alloro will stand there beside me, with her own poignant reasons for wishing to honour Anne (that’s not my story to tell).

We’ll be like a pair of beautiful, strong, tall bookends.

MEMORIAL
From there, we’ll travel to one of the Holocaust memorial sites. There is no need to detail the history. For me, there is a profound need for the act of Witnessing.

I posted previously about the night I closed my blinds and did nothing while a young girl was destroyed in the alleyway behind my house. That night, I promised I would never again be a coward who closes her eyes to reality because it’s ‘safer.’

For the last 20+ years, the script of my life tried to break that oath. My childhood and, ultimately, my marriage trained me to look away from my own reality and accept a version of ‘truth’ that was gaslit and hollow.

I’m going to these historical memorial sites because I am finally, fully, keeping the promise I made all those years ago.

I’m going there to practice the courage of looking – to stand in the absolute, undeniable truth and refuse to look away.

I’m going there to finally honour Anne, and all the others, because for too long, too many people did look away.

I’ll be standing there as a woman who finally chose to see.

BERLIN
And then, to Berlin to celebrate our survival, our thriving and our friendship. To dance and sing and rejoice in our existence upon this incredible planet.

Some part of that trip will be on a sleeper train, We both want to be able to lie there, quietly watching the scenery flick past, as twilight moves to night, and we’re rocked to sleep by the motion of the wheels and the lullaby rhythm of their sound.

My dream is to be able to time it for New Year in Berlin. We can make that happen.

MUSIC OF THE DAY – I dedicate this to myself. It’s for me from me. Yes, that’s a thing. Try it for yourself:

JP