He Doesn’t Get To Do That Anymore

01/05/24

EH is a person with no regard for others’ boundaries. That’s been covered to some extent in previous posts.

He’s also tight fisted.

I’ll give you an example of how just how tight fisted he is:

Around ten years into our marriage, he’d received a pretty decent redundancy pay out. He already had another job so it was ‘bonus’ money.

At the same time, I was transitioning between jobs, and had an awkwardly long gap between pay days.

I asked if he might help me out financially, just to cover travel and lunch expenses for a week.

He begrudgingly lent me £30 and insisted I pay it back.

For emphasis – my husband was willing to see me have to walk, several miles, to get to work and back. He was also willing to see me go hungry.

So, as I said at the start, he’s extremely tight fisted, and has little to no respect for others’ boundaries.

These two traits combined and manifested when his mail, having initially been redirected to his new house, once again started being delivered here.

To my house. For him.

Of course he only paid for the minimum 3 month period of post redirection. Bear in mind, it costs less than £20 extra to get it extended to 6 months.

His rush to have that first 3 months’ redirection set up was purely for his own deceitful convenience. He was simply hiding his plan to leave by ensuring no ‘give the game away’ mail turned up.

At no point has it crossed his mind that I might not like to have his post come here, that it might not be ok with me, and that he should continue to pay to have it forwarded. Oh no, he thinks it’s just fine and dandy to send me texts asking if there’s any post for him, and has asked more than once if I could drop it off at his sister’s house.

No boundaries.

I absolutely refused to trot around, redelivering his post to his sister – too busy, too sick, too….

After the first couple of items, which I did pass to him, any mail that’s arrived for him has been sent straight back with ‘Not Known At This Address’ scrawled across it.

This has proved fortuitous, as when he’s asked a couple of times if I have any post for him, I’ve been able to truthfully tell him there’s nothing here.

Sod him. This is not his sorting house.

My boundaries are there, even if he tries to ignore them.

JP